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Californication Hank Moody U Sweepstakes

denkiva — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 13:12:58 CST

Welcome to Hank Moody U. This semester we will be mastering the art of creative writing. Don't worry — there won't be a test at the end, but each assignment you complete will qualify you for a chance to win awesome Californication prizes!

CREATIVE WRITING 101: Shameless Pick-up Lines

Assignment 1: Write a pick-up line that would make Professor Moody proud! (And that he can save for later use!)

STARTS:	SEPTEMBER 29, 2009
ENDS:	OCTOBER 1, 2009

CREATIVE WRITING 102: Random Stimulation

Assignment 2: Write a paragraph that contains at least three (3) of the following five (5) words. Bacon, combustible, ocean, gallop, and assume.

STARTS:	OCTOBER 2, 2009
ENDS:	OCTOBER 8, 2009

CREATIVE WRITING 103: A Picture is Worth 100 Words

Assignment 3: Write a hundred-word essay based on the photo on the sweeps page!

STARTS:	OCTOBER 9, 2009
ENDS:	OCTOBER 15, 2009

CREATIVE WRITING 104:
HANK-KU

Assignment 4: Compose a haiku bout Hank Moody and his many predicaments.

STARTS:	OCTOBER 16, 2009
ENDS:	OCTOBER 22, 2009

CREATIVE WRITING 105:
CLICHE VAMPIRE LIT

Assignment 5: Write the most cliché opening line of a vampire romance novel ever!

STARTS:	OCTOBER 23, 2009
ENDS:	OCTOBER 29, 2009

PUBLIC SPEAKING 106:
HANK-KU POETRY SLAM

Assignment 6: Record and upload a video of yourself delivering your favorite Hank Haiku at http://hankhaiku.com

(Post a link to your video on the sweeps thread for a chance to win!)

STARTS:	OCTOBER 30, 2009
ENDS:	NOVEMBER 5, 2009

CREATIVE WRITING 107:
PEN A HANKISM

Assignment 7:Your assignment is to pen a comeback in the style of Hank, or, alternatively, rewrite or update a famous sentence/quote in Hank’s inimitable style.

STARTS:	NOVEMBER 6, 2009
ENDS:	NOVEMBER 12, 2009

WEEK 8

STARTS:	NOVEMBER 13, 2009
ENDS:	NOVEMBER 19, 2009

WEEK 9

STARTS:	NOVEMBER 20, 2009
ENDS:	DECEMBER 3 2009

WEEK 10

STARTS:	DECEMBER 4, 2009
ENDS:	DECEMBER 10, 2009

WEEK 11

STARTS:	DECEMBER 11, 2009
ENDS:	DECEMBER 17, 2009

WEEK 12

STARTS:	DECEMBER 18 2009
ENDS:	DECEMBER 24, 2009

GRAND PRIZE (5 awarded)

A Californication fan prize pack including:

A copy of God Hates Us All by Hank Moody
Californication Season One DVD
Californication Season Two DVD
Californication Journal
Californication Black Pen

Additional Weekly Giveaways:

Two (2) weekly random winners receive one of the following prizes:

Californication Season One DVD

Californication Season Two DVD

Californication Journal

Californication Black Pen

PLEASE NOTE: A maximum of one (1) entry per weekly Sweepstakes for each individual is permitted for online and mail-in entries. Any entrant who exceeds this entry limitation will have each of the multiple submitted entries invalidated for prize drawing/consideration.

▪ SEE COMPLETE OFFICIAL SWEEPSTAKES RULES FOR MORE INFORMATION

WEEK 7: PEN A HANKISM

denkiva — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 13:08:32 CST

ASSIGNMENT #7: PEN A HANKISM
Hank is the king of the skewering one-liner! Your assignment is to pen a comeback in the style of Hank, or, alternatively, rewrite or update a famous sentence/quote in Hank’s inimitable style. Alright students get cracking!

* Adding one Hankism to the PEN A HANKISM Sweeps thread qualifies as ONE (1) sweepstakes entry submission.*

Winners for the weekly giveaway will be randomly chosen and notified the week of November 16, 2009. Remember, every sweepstakes entry is a chance to take home one of five awesome grand prize Californication prize packs, including Californication season one and two DVD sets!

PLEASE NOTE: A maximum of one (1) entry per weekly Sweepstakes for each individual is permitted for online and mail-in entries. An entrant who exceeds this entry limitation will have each of the multiple submitted entries invalidated for prize drawing/consideration.

▪ SEE COMPLETE OFFICIAL SWEEPSTAKES RULES FOR MORE INFORMATION

WEEK 6: HANK HAIKU POETRY SLAM

denkiva — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 17:15:51 CDT

ASSIGNMENT #6: HANK HAIKU POETRY SLAM
Can You Pull Off A Hank Haiku? This week’s assignment: Record and upload a video of yourself delivering your favorite Hank Haiku at http://hankhaiku.com Post a link to your video on this thread for a chance to win - plus everyone gets a door prize this week just for entering! (Students who wrote Hank Haikus in week 4 are welcome to read their already submitted poems!)

* Adding one link to the HANK HAIKU POETRY SLAM Sweeps thread qualifies as ONE (1) sweepstakes entry submission.*

Winners for the weekly giveaway will be randomly chosen and notified the week of November 9, 2009. Remember, every sweepstakes entry is a chance to take home one of five awesome grand prize Californication prize packs, including Californication season one and two DVD sets!

WEEK 4: HANK-KU

denkiva — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 15:13:07 CDT

ASSIGNMENT #4: HANK-KU (HANK HAIKU)
We turn to the East for the next assignment! Compose a haiku bout Hank Moody and his many predicaments. Remember a haiku consists of three phrases of 5, 7, and 5.You have until October 22, 2009* to complete your first homework assignment, so get cracking!*

* Adding one haiku to the HANK-KU Sweeps thread qualifies as ONE (1) sweepstakes entry submission.*

Winners for the weekly giveaway will be randomly chosen and notified the week of October 26, 2009. Remember, every sweepstakes entry is a chance to take home one of five awesome grand prize Californication prize packs, including Californication season one and two DVD sets!

Username: amagurichan
HANK-KU:
wake up in my bed
something strange brushes against
what's your name again?

Username: prainer
HANK-KU:
Hank Moody makes me wet
All the girls want to **** him
I'm waiting for my chance

Username: tlcccc
HANK-KU:
Not a harmless flirt
Though he'll use a schoolboy's charm
To get up your skirt

Username: Seadawg
HANK-KU:
Somewhere is a girl
Hank has not had sex with
He will find her soon

Hank Moody

prainer — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 22:01:42 CDT

Hey, Californication superfans!

Click the EasyEdit button above to help create the wiki guide to

the characters of Californication!
(Don't see the EasyEdit button? Sign in or sign up.)
HONK IF YOU'RE MOODY!
visit AnaMaria Barrios Fotos and Videos

Played by: David Duchovny

Occupation: Writer

Signature look: Black T Shirt or Black Shirt with dark denim jeans.. paired with a sport jacket for dress up or a leather jacket for a more casual look..and of course, the signature sunglasses.
Personality: Pessimistic, self-loathing,loving, spontaneous, brutally honest most of the time

taste: He often wears dark jeans and his favorite black t-shirt; In LOL he is seen wearing a light brown leather jacket which he exacted as payment from Bill for giving a talk to Mia's class. He likes to listen to classic rock.

Hank's backstory:
East Coast kid who came to Hollywood when his book got optioned. Fell into the Los Angeles lifestyle and has been trying to dig himself out ever since.

Back in New York, the seasons grounded him, constantly filling him with hope and disappointment. The bright white blanket and blue skies of the first snowfall, only to turn a grimy grey the next day, awakened his senses; reminding him that life was larger than him. Without him ever knowing it, the seasons moved his internal clock; the crisp air of fall turning increasing cooler and then winter reminding to turn inward. It was this never-ending cycle from which Hank drew upon for his writing. The city of eternal sunshine and perfect bodies numbed his heart and impeded his pen. It is from great angst that best-selling novels are made. Without the seasons providing cover, angst became personal and Hank’s life began to fall apart.

Discuss Hank

VIRTUES AND VICES

Moral values: Only about the truth. Knows the value of a well-stated white lie and truly loves women, flaws and all.

Vice(s): Women, alcohol, cigarettes, ganja, and coke, drama. Extended periods of self-loathing.

Regret(s): Letting Karen get away, moving to California.

Personal Goal(s): To get Karen and Becca back and overcome his writer's block

CHARACTER CONNECTIONS

Karen
Ex-domestic partner; mother of his daughter Becca
About the relationship...It seems that she cannot find a way to live with or without Hank but she loves him.

Becca
Daughter
About the relationship...
Hank knows that in spite of all his failings, Becca is the one thing he knows he did right. As her father, he genuinely understands that he has to get this right the first time...he doesn't get a second chance to go back and raise her again.

Charlie
Agent, best friend
About the relationship...
Friends like this don't come along often, and frankly the female population might get a little jealous if it did. Charlie truly has Hank's back. The fact that he occasionally gets financial benefit from their relationship, Charlie recognizes Hank's talent. Exploiting that talent and its rewards are just a bonus.

Mia
Karen's fiance's underage daughter with whom Hank had a one-night stand
About the relationship...Mia f''d and punched Hank, set him up, stole his book, and started up a relationship with Ashby. Psycopath in training.

HANK QUOTES

Hank: "Daddy's trying out a new look."
Becca: "Are you mentally insane?"
Hank: "Yes, and I'm extremely high-functioning."

Hank (to Charlie): "B*****s."
Hank: "Funky back-tat on the small of the back there, you know what that means."
Charlie: "No"
Hank: "She likes it in the pooper."
Charlie: "Really?"
Hank: "I have no idea, I just wanted to say pooper."
"I may not go down in history, but I will go down on your sister"

"It's not fair to say BRB and then never actually BRB."
"Sweet Baby Jesus, Hank is going to Hell."
"Hey K-Fed, the little man in the boat...he's up here."

HANK'S BEST EPISODES | SCENES

Church scene in the Pilot is beyond awesome.

Fight with Todd Carr in the bookstore of 103 is classic.

Remembering a woman was a squirter before she painted his agent's face.

Flashback scenes in 108.
Karen reading Al Moody's letter to Hank - followed by a beautiful love scene in Season 1,episode 8 - California Son
Hank writing a love letter to Karen after finding out she is pregnant - Season 2,episode 10 - In Utero

PHOTOS

Californication Guide to Los Angeles

vernissage — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 20:27:59 CDT

◄ Back to home: *Californication*	CALIFORNICATION EPISODE GUIDE	CALIFORNICATION CHARACTERS	CALIFORNICATION CAST
◄ Back to home: *Californication*	CALIFORNICATION GUIDE TO L.A.	CALIFORNICATION FUN	HANK'S LITTLE BLACK BOOK

THE CALIFORNICATION GUIDE TO LOS ANGELES: Get Familiar with Hank's Hell-A!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Every dog has his day in LA. Hank, a New York transplant, ambles around real LA hotspots featured in the episodes of Californication on his numerous amorous conquests. Plot out Hank's love shacks, meat markets, and local haunts below. Don't forget to add location and landmark notes!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

How well do you know Hank's LA?

Click the EasyEdit button above to add to the city guide to
Californication's Los Angeles!
(Don't see the EasyEdit button? Sign in or sign up.)

Location/landmark: Church Featured in episode(s): Pilot What happens there: Hank demonstrates his religiousness ... sorta	Location/landmark: Book Soup on Sunset Featured in episode(s): Pilot, 103 (*** of Babylon) What happens there**: Hank meets Mia, beats the crap out of Todd freakin Carr.
Location/landmark: Ray Kappe, architect "Benton House", Brentwood,LA, (1987-1994) Featured in episode(s): Episode 7 - "Girls, Interrupted" What happens there:Hank wrangles for Karen to get a look at a much admired modernist work and she gets the brief to design a complementary addition.	Location/landmark:Ray Kappe, architect "Benton House", Brentwood,LA Featured in episode(s):Episode 7 - "Girls, Interrupted" What happens there:Published in GA Houses 81 (May 2004)
Location/landmark: Ray Kappe, architect "Benton House", Brentwood,LA (designed 1987; construction 1987-1994) http://www.kappedu.com/benton.html# https://digital.lib.washington.edu/php/architect/record.phtml?type=publication&publicationid=2157 Featured in episode(s):Episode 7 - "Girls, Interrupted" What happens there: Modernism Influence: David Godsell, Architect's own House (1960) Beaumaris, Melbourne, Australia- Sean Godsell's father: a dynasty of architects	Location/landmark: Ray Kappe, architect "Benton House", Brentwood, LA Featured in episode(s):Episode 7 - "Girls, Interrupted" What happens there: Modernism Influence: David Godsell, Architect's own House (1960) Beaumaris, Melbourne, Australia
Location/landmark: Featured in episode(s): What happens there: Hank is thinking how much he loathes LA whilst Karen muses how much she loves the City	Location/landmark: *Jonathon Borofsky, Ballerina Clown* (1989) Featured in episode(s):Episode 2 - "Hell-A Woman" What happens there**: Hank's new Porsche, with the lone copy of his new novella, get's hi-jacked while he's talking to some hot chick in the middle of the nite. Then, he walks home thru the empty streets of Venice.
Location/landmark: Featured in episode(s): What happens there:	Location/landmark: Frank Gehry, Chiat-Day Offices (1991) with Claes Oldenburg and Coosje van Bruggen Featured in episode(s): What happens there:
Location/landmark: Randy's Donuts (1953) A Venturi-Brown, "Duck Building" : designed by Robert Graham http://www.nytimes.com/2007/10/14/nyregion/nyregionspecial2/14colli.html just west of the 405 Fwy. at Manchester (near LAX) Featured in episode(s): What happens there:	Location/landmark: David Hertz-Stacy Fong (Syndesis) McKinley House (1999-2000) Stage 1 Featured in episode(s): All episodes What happens there: This is Bill's house, where Karen now lives. Mia and Becca also live here.
Location/landmark: Rudolph M Schindler, King's Road House (1921-1922) Featured in episode(s): What happens there:	Location/landmark: David Hertz-Stacy Fong (Syndesis) McKinley House (1999-2000) Stage 1 2420 McKinley Ave., Venice, CA Featured in episode(s): What happens there:

David Hertz -Stacy Fong (Syndesis)
McKinley House Stage 2

Architecture & Trivia.
We find out in Episode 7 that Karen is an architect with sustainable development credentials.
She designs Bill's house which in truth is the much admired David Hertz-Stacy Fong, McKinley House: a husband and wife architects' own house with passive heating and cooling techniques embedded in the scheme. Both the Ray Kappe, "Benton House" and the McKinley House which is the key set are both published in the Japanese periodical, GA Houses 81 (May 2004). They also share the same alma mater: David Hertz studied at SCI-Arc (Southern California Institute of Architecture) where Ray Kappe was the founding director and Chair of Architecture. For very sharp observers, on Karen's coffee table in episode 9 as she is reading by the fire Charles Bukowski's Sifting Through The Madness for the Word, The Line, The Way: New Poems (2003) is a recent book Venice, CA: Art and Architecture in a Maverick Community (2007) by Michael Webb. Somewhat self-referential as many of the icons of the title sequence and moreover the McKinley House itself is featured in the book.

Life imitates art. This guide was featured in the World's Greenest Homes' feature on the McKinley House The full version: Part 1

Part 2
The September 2007 edition of Dwell Magazine sits well thumbed.
Dwell is good. See http://www.dwell.com/homes/new/2877311.html for a Californication reprise.

As for Karen's comment in episode 7 at the Ray Kappe House, "I think it was Ruskin that once said .."Without architecture, there would be no remembering."
This is a reference from John Ruskin's "The Seven Lamps of Architecture" (1849). In Chapter 6 headed 'The Lamp of Memory' Ruskin writes: "It is as the centralization and protectress of this sacred influence, that Architecture is to be regarded by us with the most serious thought. We may live without her, and worship without her, but we cannot remember without her. "

In episode 8 It is not without whimsy or comment that Hank receives a letter from his father in Levittown foretelling his father's final soliquoy to his son.
Hank's father, Al Moody writes from Levittown, NY.
(a real address: Criminal Justice Media!)

Levittown, this modest suburban tract housing became paradigmatic of the post-war suburbs. White picket fences and cookie cutter housing. Is this where Hank grew up?

Denise Scott Brown and Robert Venturi most notably in the 1970's collaborated in theoretical research and education on the nature of cities with their studies "Learning From Las Vegas" and "Learning From Levittown."These projects challenged architects to study the human use and social context of architecture, the role of perception and memory in architecture, and the communicative possibilities of architecture. A primary focus had to do with symbolism and iconography. This turned the authors once again to history, to rediscover facets of architecture forgotten by the Modern movement.

Analyzing developer-built housing, Venturi-Brown & Steve Izenour noted that even bland tract homes came with a staggering array of options, which homeowners embraced with abandon. They also marvelled at advertising copy for postwar suburban developments (''These Houses Are Exactly the Same! They Just Look Different!'').

http://www.hno.harvard.edu/gazette/2005/06.09/15-radmedal.html
http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=950DE3DE1E3DF93AA35750C0A96F948260

Mies van der Rohe Glass Skyscraper Project (1922)

Charlie & Marcy's House

In Season 2 Episode 2 - "The Great Ashby" Sonja asks Karen, "How would you feel about restoring an original Lautner house with me?"

K-"Don't **** with me."

S-"I'm not; I'm bidding on one tomorrow."
---------------------------------------------------------

This is a reference to the seminal architect, John Lautner, one of the important Californian Modernists who along with architects such as Charles and Ray Eames, Craig Ellwood, Pierre Koenig, Raphael Sorriano and Richard Neutra created some of the iconic West-Coast mid-century houses; See particularly John Entenza's Arts & Architecture (1938-1967) magazine and the Case Study Programme. Lautner was a glaring omission. Lautner was apprenticed to Frank Lloyd Wright and came to California in 1938 and practised there until his death in 1994 aged 83. He was especially known for his bold, soaring, expressive use of concrete and cantilevered sculptural forms. Some of his houses such as the Elrod House, 1968 in Palm Springs featured in films:the James Bond film, Diamonds are Forever, 1971; and 'the Chemosphere',1960 was in Brian de Palma's movie, Body Double, 1984. Recently, The Los Angeles Times featured the Garcia Residence, recently renovated by Marmol Radziner, and the restoration of John Lautner's, Harpel House. There is currently considerable interest among architectural and mid-century enthusiasts to restore and maintain these properties before they are destroyed by redevelopment. The architects Leo Marmol and Ron Radziner of Marmol Radziner notably restored the extraordinary Kaufmann Desert House designed by Richard Neutra (1946) one of the greatest houses built in the twentieth century. Kaufmann's Palm Springs holiday house was a nice complement to his main house, Fallingwater, Frank Lloyd Wright's masterpiece. Marmol Radziner also design very nice prefabs.

http://www.marmol-radziner.com/html/body/press/nyt_041600/text.html
http://www.christies.com/features/special-sites/kaufmann_house/

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http://www.latimes.com/features/home/la-hm-lautner0410-pg,1,1684503.photogallery

http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/la/la-times-house-garden-roundup/restored-john-lautners-harpel-housela-times-41008-047664
http://www.johnlautner.org/
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A Very Californication (Pun) Ad: Stop Bad Oral
Cnr S Occidental Blvd & 2801 W 6th St
Los Angeles, CA 90057

Probably a photoshopped fiction: see Google Maps Street View

Julian Self (the philandering guru wanker) also known as "the Artist Within", and Sonja's domestic space

Compare with the iconic Pierre Koenig Case Study House #22 (1959)
http://users.tce.rmit.edu.au/e03159/ModMelb/mm2/lect/50_60_70/html/casestudy/casestudy4.html

John Lautner's Sheats/ Goldstein House (1963)

Lew Ashby Mansion, Rick Rubin Studio's, "The Mansion", 2451 Laurel Canyon Blvd, Los Angeles
http://www.laurelcanyon.org/20cHist.html

"It was also during this period that frequent cabin-guest Jimi Hendrix briefly resided in the Errol Flynn mansion to the north of the property. The mansion was once a home for "wayward women" and was also occupied in earlier years by notables ranging from Bugsy Siegel to W.C. Fields. The mansion is currently owned by Rick Rubin, co-founder of Def Jam Records and producer of The Red Hot Chili Peppers, Nine Inch Nails, The Black Crowes and numerous others."

Seminal California Modern Architecture from Raymond Kappe as originally published in Arts & Architecture in 1955.

Lili Haydn at the reconstructed Hollywood Bowl undertaken by Architects Hodgetts + Fung Design based on the 1929 iteration of the shell structure.

Postcard: Burton Frasher, 1936, Ponoma Public Library

Sidney Myer Music Bowl, Melbourne Australia, 1958 Freeman Yuncken architects per Barry Patten

Brooks Avenue, Venice Beach near Speedway (one way side street)

Google Maps Streetview of Karen and Hank's Loft in Brooks Avenue, Venice Beach

Venice Beach Canals
VideoVenice Beach Canals 2

A very useful site for Venice architecture is here

WEEK 5: CLICHE VAMPIRE LIT

denkiva — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 11:52:31 CDT

ASSIGNMENT #5: CLICHE VAMPIRE LIT
Are you the next Anne Rice or Stephenie Meyers? You'll have to channel your inner goth for this assignment! Write the most cliché opening line of a vampire romance novel ever! You have until October 29, 2009* to complete your next homework assignment, so get cracking!*

* Adding one opening line to the CLICHE VAMPIRE LIT Sweeps thread qualifies as ONE (1) sweepstakes entry submission.*

Winners for the weekly giveaway will be randomly chosen and notified the week of November 2, 2009. Remember, every sweepstakes entry is a chance to take home one of five awesome grand prize Californication prize packs, including Californication season one and two DVD sets!

Hank Moody's Little Black Book

mamaba — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 13:22:38 CDT

Back to home: *Californication*	CALIFORNICATION EPISODE GUIDE	CALIFORNICATION CHARACTERS	CALIFORNICATION CAST
Back to home: *Californication*	CALIFORNICATION GUIDE TO L.A.	CALIFORNICATION FUN	HANK'S LITTLE BLACK BOOK

Got Californication Love?

Click the EasyEdit button above to add an entry to Hank Moody's Little Black Book! (Don't see the EasyEdit button? Sign in or sign up.)

Episode: Season 1 e02-05

Name: Meredith.

Age: Thirty-something.

Occupation: Divorce Lawyer.

How they met: Perfect first blind double date.

Location of act: Hank's bedroom.

Kink factor: Boring.

Pillow talk: Not much of a pillow talker (other than saying "LOL" and "BJ"). Conversation is not what she needs from Hank.

Repercussions: Stole someone else's dog for her. In love with a married man. If she and Hank had met in a different time under different circumstances, they may have had shot, but they both realize that they at most will be friends but never in love.

Episode: s1e06

Name: Surfer Girl.

Age: Early twenties.
Occupation: Surfing as a girl.
The thought of having a career has never crossed her mind.

How they met: Supermarket.

Location of act: Hank's floor.

Kink factor: Out of sight.

Pillow talk: Won't give up her name. **** buddies don't talk.

Repercussions: Records and guitar stolen. Hank loves the rare romance that he feels with this mysterious girl. Cant trust

Episode: s1 e02
Name: Sonja.
Age: Late thirties/ early forties.

Occupation: Being hot.

How they met: Karen's set up dinner party.

Location of act: Karen and Bill's bed.

Kink factor: Solid.

Pillow talk: As long as they toking it.

Repercussions: Damaged expensive painting.

Episode: Multiple.

Name: Mia.

Age: 16

Occupation: School girl.

How they met: Bookstore.

Location of act: Hank's bedroom.

Kink factor: Keeps up with the best of them. Claims to be a virgin.

Pillow talk: Less talking, more punching.

Repercussions: She's actually Bill's daughter. She's 16! To young and crazy

Episode: California Son (s1e08)

Name: Beatrice or "Trixie"

Age: ?

Occupation: Prostitute

How they met: At a bar

Location of act: Hotel Room

Kink factor: High

Pillow talk: Arguing over whether he's going to pay her

Repercussions: Getting beat up by her
pimp

Episode: All of them, but specifically in California Son (s1e08)

Name: Karen

Age: ?

Occupation: Architect

How they met: In NYC at a concert

Location of act: Hank's bedroom

Kink factor: Low

Pillow talk: Not too much

Repercussions: Hank writes a new novella (a good repercussion for once), but is rejected by Karen again. Go for it

Episode: s1e10

Name: Laura

Age: Twenties/Thirties

Occupation: Actress

How they met: gym; drinks

Location of act: Hank's place

Kink factor: Menage-a-trois with Charlie; Karen and Marcy pop into Hank's bedroom just as Laura squirts all over Charlie's face

Pillow talk: "She's gonna blow!"

Repercussions: Frustrated Marcy and Karen; Hank and Charlie try to kiss up;sexual tension is in the air...

Episode: Pilot
Name: ?
Age: ?
Occupation: ?

How they met:

Location of act: Her bedroom

Kink factor: She is married. Doubles as a nun when Hank is sleeping.

Pillow talk: "Luckily for you I've got a GPS device, I've stored it up my ass."

Repercussions: Her husband comes home early.

Episode: 2

Name: The Blonde aka Brooke Banner

Age: Twenties Occupation: Actress pornstar
How they met: On the road
Location of act: Her place
Kink factor: Low
Pillow talk: "Not those lips!"

Repercussions: Her baby daughter starts crying so Hank leaves; but not before "confiscating" one of her movies "for further study".

Name: Never Said

Age: Not Specified

Occupation: Sales Professional

How they met: Porsche Dealership

Location of act: Street Alley

Kink factor: Porsche

Pillow talk: "What do I have to do..."

Repercussions:
None

Episode: s1e1 Pilot

Name: Hot Girl

Age: Twenty-something

Occupation: Socialite

How they met: Restaurant

Location of act: Her place

Kink Factor: Extreme

Pillow talk: Defile me

Repercussions: She calls him an *******.

Episode:

Name:

Age:

Occupation:

How they met:

Location of act:

Kink factor:

Pillow talk:

Repercussions:

Back to home: Californication

WEEK 3: A PICTURE IS WORTH 100 WORDS

denkiva — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 16:01:27 CDT

ASSIGNMENT #3: A PICTURE IS WORTH 100 WORDS

A picture is worth a thousand words, but this week it's only worth a hundred! Write a hundred-word essay based on the above photo! You have until October 15, 2009 to be eligible for the weekly prize drawing, so get cracking!

* Adding one 100-word essay to the A Picture is Worth 100 Words Sweeps thread qualifies as ONE (1) sweepstakes entry submission.*

Winners for the weekly giveaway will be randomly chosen and notified the week of October 19, 2009. Remember, every sweepstakes entry is a chance to take home one of five awesome grand prize Californication prize packs, including Californication season one and two DVD sets!

Username: drmagazine
100-word essay:
The Lecture Style of Professor Moody.

It would well behoove the average Academician to study closely the uniquely progressive techniques employed by Professor Hank Moody. Though the Lecture Hall is quite full he prefers to impart his pearls of wisdom in a more one-on-one setting, hence, the slightly underdressed coed lounging on his desk, to whom he gives his attention exclusively. Employing the chalkboard extensively, he illuminates his lessons with a series of creative and somewhat slipshod illustrations which serve to further stimulate the attentive student by setting up within his psyche a cognitive dissonance between the image and the spoken word.

Username: katmagick
100-word essay: I really don't know how lounging provocatively across my desk helps with your learning retention, but hey, who am I to judge. Whatever works for you is fine by me. Please, if you need private lessons, do not hesitate to ask. I can be most accommodating.

Username: tlcccc
100-word essay: "My mind, much like this blackboard, has gone blank. I'm a Prof now at an esteemed learning institution, Dollface. I'm bound by certain standards with my students regardless of this "horny college girl seeks daddy-figure professor" vibe which feels to me like doing time in purgatory on April Fools Day. I find myself both distracted and over-stimulated. It's like eating spaghetti with chopsticks while on a roller coaster. Understand? I'm trying to say there's clearly room for more than one on that desk and what's your phone number so I can catch you at a campus kegger later."

Username: ky2here
100-word essay: Sometime in the 16th century, an unknown woman took the time to sit for an unknown artist - Leonardo DaVinci. She would never have been noticed or remembered if she hadn't been in the right place at the right time. I want centuries of men to gaze upon your visage with wanton desire and primal, visceral needs. You have the potential power to captivate future generations with your exquisite bone structure and once in a lifetime face. This will be an important nude portrait and I'll help you achieve a more disheveled look. Your look deserves immortality or at least immorality.

WEEK 2: RANDOM STIMULATION

denkiva — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 15:55:25 CDT

◄ BACK TO: CALIFORNICATION HANK MOODY U SWEEPS

ASSIGNMENT #2: RANDOM STIMULATION
Here's an assignment to get you out of your writer's block! Write a paragraph that contains at least three (3) of the following five (5) words. Bacon, combustible, ocean, gallop, and assume You have until October 8, 2009* to complete your second homework assignment, so get cracking!*

* Adding one paragraph to the Random Stimulation Sweeps thread qualifies as ONE (1) sweepstakes entry submission.*

Winners for the weekly giveaway will be randomly chosen and notified the week of October 12, 2009. Remember, every sweepstakes entry is a chance to take home one of five awesome grand prize Californication prize packs, including Californication season one and two DVD sets!

Username: MrPusher
Paragraph: I awoke to the smell of bacon frying, which would usually be a good thing. But when your head feels like shoreline rocks being beaten mercilessly by the waves of a tumultuous, combustible ocean, you can only assume what's going to come next: either a methodically paced jog, or immediate gallop, to the nearest porcelain receptacle.

Username: tlcccc
Paragraph: I roll over in bed, stretch boundlessly and think, "Damn! Life has been good since hitting that Powerball." The sun drapes over me as I watch a few soft waves crest the sand from the melodic peace offered by a crystal blue OCEAN. My mind immediately begins to think about what I will do first. Today I decide to start with taking Sea Biscuit out for a GALLOP on the beach. By the time I get back, Monique, my girlfriend and stunningly beautiful Victoria's Secret model will be awake. She'll fix us a nice lunch. Sure, she can only make one thing that barely constitutes cooking, but first and foremost, she is so ridiculously hot she might be COMBUSTIBLE and second, who doesn't like a BLT? Everyone likes BACON but I silently wonder if she will remember to include the tomato this time. And as predictable as the tides, I ASSUME after lunch Monique will want to bang me somewhere outside and unusual. I am "up" for anything, except the hammock which threw my back out for two weeks. She'll go shopping for the remainder of the afternoon and I will take a long nap. Tonight we'll celebrate my 75th birthday. Oh yes, it's a beautiful life.

Username: katmagick
Paragraph: I just saw Kevin Bacon while I was riding my horse down by the ocean. If my steed would have slowed from a gallop, I would have stopped to get his autograph. I assume it was Kevin Bacon because he was blasting the Footloose cd on his boombox and dancing in that wildly combustible manner which he is known for.

Username: murgento
Paragraph: I think it’s safe to assume that if the world was made of bacon… Well; I would have had a heart attack years ago. The crisp salty fried pig meat, marbled with fat that crumbles into every taste bud as I chew every last essence of flavor into my mouth before I swallow defeated, accepting that it wouldn’t last forever. There, sitting at the old laminated round wood table like a knight having breakfast with King Arthur, sitting, waiting for more. I could hear the sticky pops of the melted grease in the pan, the combustible artery clogging heaven that can both fry joy and blister pain. It puddles in the pan, taunting the cooker, impatiently demanding another victim. And at that moment, another piece splashes into the grease with roaring sizzle reminiscent of a wave crashing from out of the ocean on the sand of the beach that didn’t stand a chance. Just then, I can feel my blood gallop through their every vein like wild horses trying to escape captivity. And now; I who is impatient, waiting and wanting more…

leather jacket

vanslack — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 23:18:32 CDT

There is no abstract available for this page revision.

Californication on Showtime | Fan Wiki

Patty — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 18:38:37 CDT

WELCOME TO THE
CALIFORNICATION WIKI

-----------------------------------------------------
What's different about this official Californication fan community? It's all up to you, the fans, to write the definitive guide to the characters, episodes, cast, and themes of the hit Showtime Original Series Californication.
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CALIFORNICATION SEASON 3 RETURNS SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 27th AT 10:00 P.M. ONLY ON SHOWTIME.

Guest stars announced for Californication Season 3!
*Plus* Californication News

Californication Episode 301 "Wish You Were Here"

--------------------------------- Californication Episode Guides
---------------------------------
Are you ready to dive into Season 2? Start watching and contribute what you know.

--------------------------------- Californication Guide to L.A.
---------------------------------
Every dog has his day in Hell-A. Check out the Californication guide to Los Angeles.

Share your love for the characters of Californication

Have a love/hate relationship with one (or three) of the characters? Let it all out here! Add to the profiles of your favorite Californication characters.

Get nosey and browse through Hank Moody's notorious Little Black Book. Be sure to jam-pack all the dirty details in here! Jot an entry in Hank Moody's Little Black Book.

Have the 411 on the people, places, and things?

Calling all superfans! Add images, trivia, and vital stats to your favorite Californication stars' bios.

Know your Tinseltown terrain? Plot out all of Hank's LA hotspots! Add to the Californication Guide to Los Angeles.

Enter a new sweepstakes every week and you'll have a chance to get your hands on awesome Californication fan prize packs!

Enter the Hank Moody U Sweeps

Record and upload a video of yourself delivering your favorite Hank Haiku for the chance to have your video featured on air!

TAKE THE QUIZ!

Are you a Hank-u master? Pick the best translation for each Hank-tastic Haiku!

WEEK 1: SHAMELESS PICK-UP LINES

denkiva — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 12:35:59 CDT

◄ BACK TO: CALIFORNICATION HANK MOODY U SWEEPS

ASSIGNMENT #1: SHAMELESS PICK-UP LINES
Write a pick-up line that would make Professor Moody proud (and that he can save for later)! You have until October 1, 2009* to complete your first homework assignment, so get cracking!*

* Adding one pick-up line to the Shameless Pick-up Lines Sweeps thread qualifies as ONE (1) sweepstakes entry submission.*

Winners for the weekly giveaway will be randomly chosen and notified the week of October 4, 2009. Remember, every sweepstakes entry is a chance to take home one of five awesome grand prize Californication prize packs, including Californication season one and two DVD sets!

Username: Seadawg
Pick-up line: Teacher, student, the best relationships are the ones where you are both...

Username: katmagick
Pick-up line: Excuse me..do you have sex with strangers? No? Well let me introduce myself.

Username: drmagazine
Pick-up line: I hope you're a poetry major because I need some help with my Longfellow.

Username: 9Catsz
Pick-up line: I really like your peaches, mind if I shake your tree?